Happy 15th Birthday!

I wish nothing but a wonderful and a bright future for you. Here's to you and to many successes in your life. Happy 15th birthday!

Every year I think next year will be different....In that hope 15 years passed, and again here I am writing  on this day.......All I Wish is you do well in your exams and life,  make your own place, live life passionately and be successful. I guess that will be the day when we will do things differently and hope you will be able to walk easier Path than I.Most important  lesson of life which you need to learn at this stage of life is to communicate effectively, you must learn the art of not just expressing what you feel and want clearly but also to listen carefully. Its important to share you  thoughts  with your family and friends and also to hear them as well.Never forget to Help others in Need, you are fortunate than many others around you, put all of them to use and make a difference in others live too.Finding the lesson in every mistake you make is very important in life. We all learned it hard way, we make more mistake than we are willing to admit, we are bound to make it, thats a part of growing up and that is how we learn Life's lesson, that's what teaches us how to do things properly. You need to learn how to not repeate them and how to  take smart , informed, appropriate and calculated risk in life and know you are responsible for all the choices you makes, decisions you take, your behavior, thoughts and even self-esteem.Life has its share of ups and downs,It is very easy to give up but difficult to keep moving on with a smile,so embrace every step of life with optimism. After all positivity is what makes any obstacle seem little.Learn to hear your intutions,  a thought which came from nowhere... follow your  insticts and gut feeling.I always stressed on your studies, studying regularly  and giving  attention to all subject is important. There are area's where more is needed, clear concept and problem solving techniques is very important too. All you need to do is practice regularly. Never ever shy from taking help from your teachers , family and friends. All you need to do is understand  subject, practice it and prioritize things and look out for  problems and mistakes and get them correct.Good results follow for those who have worked hard. I am sure you will understand  my angers and frustration someday. 


Single Parentings makes it even more difficult. I know I am tough on you these days , but please understand  its for your own good. "They say even Diamond needs cutting to become precious. Wolrd is tough and competitive and realising ,accepting  and adaptong early is good for better life and future ahead."Just want to say that if you can't , nobody can.  Its only you who can turn around the world.Plan it out well "Love you and wish you a very Happy Birthday  once again.

Lost Friends - No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth. – Robert Southey

Old friends are the great blessing of one's later years . 2018  is kind of lucky year for me so far. I won a Lottery ( my Old  lost friends)   I have found two of my very old time friends. 

I am feeling Nostalgic 

They have a memory of the same events and have the same mode of thinking. - Horace Walpole

I am so Privileged

Remember that the most valuable antiques are dear old friends. - H. Jackson Brown

These friends had been absent from my life from almost 18 + years. Had anyone of them been physically present, my load would have been a little lighter; my loneliness would have been less intense. Revisiting shared history, and underneath the years apart is a strong foundation built with  almost two decades of friendship and separation and good part is reconnection and intensity still remains the same after all these years .
Specially today when we were reminiscing about the past after 18 years. We were able to look back into those empty rooms left  wide open by time apart and fill them with words and emotions and sentiments as if there were no time lost at all, but ( unfortunately or fortunately) I am spellbound I don't know what to say because its relative in a good and bad way....I wish I remembered it all about them but at the same time i am thankful that i have forgotten few things hence I said (# RELATIVE) but  I could have met them before, would have put in efforts to find them but things happened only when it has to happen...... and  I am so happy about this day today ( 8th April 2018). that after all these years my friends they both remember every bit of it, about us, about me ... unlike me... I have faded memories... so I am lucky to have them. Today I am also feeling so nice about the fact that ( people remembered me fondly and they have high thoughts  and views about me, I am feeling special  at least for (someone).

If I could, I would have bottled the good feelings so I could pour them out as  and when required, good memories always helps. Instead, I  though I should  pen it down. So here I am after a very long time trying  to capture them on my blog while they still warm my heart.

Life has been moving so fast lately, too fast sometimes but I miss the way things were back then. I miss how spending time together  with friends used to be, how uncomplicated and selfless friendship used to be unlike today where on the name of friendship everyone is trying to cut  a deal with each other on every step and asking the same questions over and again you ask for a help or discuss something ( What is there for me in It ) It has become so hard to meet friends physically or talk on phone, I miss  the time when conversations that stretched for hours....endless discussions...sleepovers, borrowing cloths, sharing every small things happened during the day...

Now we have (almost) grown to accept the current reality of our friendship - a reality which is going to stay for long long time ( text, emails, whats app, Facebook, twitter,..and so on )

Somehow we have accepted the art of the comfortable silence. But i still wish things were different , I wrote sometime back that human interaction is missing somewhere...  

So when my friend said they will come over to see me ....... not that lets keep chatting forever we felt physical presence is so imp to share all we have got from last 18+ years to share and I can't wait to see you guys around, I like it authentic and real, to be seen and known. 

So when we are together again, it is going to be lot of fun

If- Bread with Lyrics.

Jab Chaha Jazbaat Se Khela

Happy 13 Birthday Son!!!

Happy Birthday Son! You turned 13 today. I can't believe that, you are no longer a baby boy, but you are not a big man yet.You may have officially become a teenager today but you will still remain a kid for the next five years

I am once again writing here, about you and Our Journey of 13 years. From Past couple of years I was living outside India and I am happy to be here this year. But your exams are on and we are not able to celebrate it the way I wished. I wonder when you will grow up, will you look back and say you had a great childhood, am I able to provide all that you expected. 

I am not perfect and now when I look back, i wish i could have spent more time with you. I wish I was more patient I wish I did not yell at you so much. I really wish I could take back all those moments I was stressed with Life or with work, or situations around us. All those moments we spent together though, the bad, the good and the difficulty, have shaped you, made you an independent person, and so much more mature than I ever was at your age.  I am sure you will understand why I tell you “No” from time to time about certain things because it is best for you will not know what I am talking now and why things were the way they were.

I hope someday you will surely understand that what you say is important to me, and I really do care and love you. I care about you more than anybody and will always be your biggest friend and most ardent supporter. 

I must say, you are the sweetest Kid any mom can have, who understand the limitation and adjust with the situation. I am sure this quality of yours I s going to take you far ahead… We all seek best of everything, but due to some reason if we don’t get it, we must learn to accept the reality and facts and keep moving positively with whatever situation life throws you in to. I am glad you understand that as a kid, when its least expected. As single parent I couldn’t be more proud.

I am Happy and Fearful at the same time about your Journey here onward towards adulthood. These are formative years.

Every decision you will take on this juncture will be very crucial and has a consequence which will not only impact your today but will impact your Future too for the rest of your life. May God be with you and know I will always be at arm’s length in case you need me.

I want to take this opportunity to tell you, how life is going to be here onward, you are entering in to second phase of life, you will have yours ups and down, mistakes you will make, problems you will face, What to look forward too, and what you should be careful about. I am sure you will pass, and will learn from your mistakes and will keep moving.

Few Things you must remember

1. Continue to be Kind and respectful

2. Feeling angry, sad, or powerless at times is okay. Don’t fight those feelings, but rather find a way to get to a better place.

3. Educate yourself Knowledge is Power. Teenage can be the best or the worst phase of your life depending on how you live it. Focus on your studies, stick to your goals and don’t take on bad habits.

4. Believe in Yourself and stand up for what you believe in. Have a big heart, forgive easily.

5. Pick your friends carefully, number of friends you have is not important but quality and character is important.

6.Always be a gentleman, Open the door, always let a lady go first, pull out chair for girl/young Lady/Old women/all women. Always  offer a seat to a lady  bus/train, wherever you can. Always respect a Women (they are someone's Mom,grandma,daughter,sister too).

7.You must learn to save and manage your Money.

8.Always give a firm handshake and look people in the eye when you talk to them.

9.You can accomplish anything you aspire for, determination, hard work, perseverance will take you to greater heights.

10. Be careful before you talk and give things in writing, you will never be able to take it back.

11. Hang in there when life gets dark. Always think Positive even if it feels like life is falling apart. 

12.Nerver Sacrifice three things, Your family, Your Heart and your dignity

13. Be Happy and be grateful for what you have and Always say Thank you.

No matter what you do. No matter what you say. I might not always agree with you and we even might not like each other all the time, but I will always love you for being you.

I wish you all the health wealth and wisdom on your B’day today once again!

Human Interaction is missing Somewhere

I lived by myself for a large part of my 20's and 30's. I have  spent major  part of my life as the queen of my own castle, but somewhere I have missed the presence of king.......

But for me  it's through circumstance rather than choice.

People often ask me, do you love or loathe living alone? Do you relish the freedom that comes from being able to do what you want, when you want, or would you prefer to be living with others? 

I always say one of the best things about living with significant other in my opinion  is having someone to greet you when you get home and someone to talk about your day with and its hard when you come home to empty house.  I simply love doing things together around the house, to spend most evenings and weekends together. It is the simple things like sharing the cooking, doing dishes together, talking about your day at work, laundry, News, politics, spiritual discussions, sports, movies, kids, and working together around the garden/home. Each of us has our strengths and preferences as to what we like doing so it makes for a great team together rather being alone. Someone just to say I am  right here, fully present with you in this moment.

Some people  say it’s easy in today’s world, about having online friends / social networking site and all technology related interactions, But  no one realises that personal human touch has its own charm  and no matter how long you spent on texting, to and fro or emailing each other  still it doesn't give you any kind of satisfaction which comes with human touch  human interaction is real time  looking at each other in the eyes and discussing things sharing about the life in general ,happiness sadness, love but technology seems to be subtly destroying the meaningfulness of interactions we have with others, disconnecting us  emotionally and from the world around us, and leading to an imminent sense of isolation and aloneness....

One thing I learned is that technology is not enough when it comes to communication. There is a need for physical and non-verbal communication also. A simple touch or hug becomes extremely important. I now know what it must be like for many who live alone through no choice of their own. I feel for those who find themselves alone through death - particularly our seniors.  I can really feel for all the people out there who are going through this technology interactions with kids and grandkids but just can't feel them anymore. Kids feel they have done their bit by texting or emailing...but all they need is you and personal interaction with you, that ear-splitting grin and smiling eyes, face to face  interaction  that comfort us and provide us with some important sense of well-being..that's what  exactly is missing in our life. Some nights when I rest my head on my pillow, I think to myself how nice it would be if that pillow were instead a human chest. And some days, when I see couples roaming the streets holding hands so tightly as if they could never let go, I feel a twinge of sadness. I just want to spend more time together with our friends, family, significant others and to make the relationships that count last, and not just completely rely on technology.

Look at me.... I have no one to discuss what thoughts I am going through or why I got these kinds of thoughts in the first place.... if I had someone to talk about it or discuss it, I may not be posting it here......When we were kid's there used to a question  for easy writing " Technology is boon or curse"....I am still trying to figure that out I don't know what I had written back then ... but after so many years my mind is still debating that subject, on which I must have written when I had no clue what am I writing and why am I writing... may be just to score marks....:)But now it’s different.