Summer Vacation

Summer vactaions were coming to an end, the sinking feeling in my heart deepened. have been batteling with this feeling from past one week...and now one more night left and he will be gone...:( Its a tough call to handel.....its so hard to see an empty house, without the chit chat, noises, demands and lot of hustel bustel which only child can bring in. I have always been fighting this big battel between my Head nd heart about my decision of sending him to boarding school inspite of his reluctance. Changes are often unaceptable be its kids or we as an adults... But responsiveness to changes is what keeps us going... one would certainly not know unless you try it out. so i tried and you only know when one weighs the pros and cons and finds that boarding outweighs living at home for various reasons.When we become parents we want to give best in the owrld to our child....i too have dreamt. Now month long vacation is over and i am going through all sorts of emotions, but as a working mother, one of my biggest challenges was and is time management, And within that finding enough time for him for his studies and other activities... so on the other hand i am trying to convince myself that whatever i have decided for him was the best. One hand he is in denial...Maa...i will not go back...i will say with you.... why i cnt stay here?...why is it important for you to send me back..... why i came back in this vacation also..wheni can stay there for rest of the months...i can stay there for this vactaion month also... and N number of Such Why's i get stuck in too.... it becomes so difficult to answer such WHY thing.... On the other hand when he is really calm, he is all excited excited at the prospect of going back. We prepared the list of things he wanted to carry back. Truth remains.....that he will go back...and i will be on my own again... missing him every day and night...

Package Deal

People Keep asking why i am still single,why I have not dated for over 8 years.they keep telling you still have one child and you still stand a chance to get a man Being a Single mom in countries like India is quite a big deal.... although everyone around you will claim that we all live in a modern society, but unfortunatly certain stigmas still exist. Some view them as perfect mistress mterial.Some rich class thinks they can financially support them and make them available for themeselves whenever they want..... some think why do we need a single mom when we can have best one. In other words, they would not willingly choose because in choosing us, they would also have to explain to their friends parents,and family as to why they chose a single mom. why when they could easily have someone younger, more available and without all those excess baggage to deal with. No man in question would willingly want to raise another man’s kid.No One wants a Package Deal. Still We go through that, Its like daydreaming and romanticizing about being back in a life with full of love, romance wistful relationship, and how great that someone is going to be when we fall in love again and we may get lucky. Dating as single mom can be really challanging. taking charge of a package deal is quite a task its not the end of the world and if someone is meant for you they will love you with or without kids....