CHANGE

 

Everyone is afraid of change.  Everyone is afraid of the unknown.

The reality is that I am afraid, too……But I always wanted a new city, something interesting and different than now .Wanted to go somewhere I have never lived before.

But Life is strange…we being a social animal…one always want a life surrounded with family, friends and known people but everyone is not lucky to get it….and for me  it was always without them….though i was lucky to have few people in life who contributed significantly in my life and I will always remain indebted to them and point to be noted  is they were not even  related to me and we didn’t had any blood relationship….but still whatever I am I am because of them.

I have mostly lived a nomadic life, being a sportswomen always wandering here and there for tournaments, camps and all. But from last  couple of years I have stayed in Delhi…..and Now when I decided to move which I always wanted too but lot many people  around me said…how can I leave a stable life and take a decision of  moving to a new place.

But I always believed Stability is a farce, which is why finding life/solace in it creates such a shock once something goes wrong.  And my so called stability in Delhi is a result of shock than anything else it took me so long to recover from the rude shock which life gave me.  Nothing in my life could be the same from one day to the next so I always hope for the best and plan for the worst.

I don’t know what future holds for me….but past has taught me various lessons…Life doesn’t move as we plan it…  at least I have not experienced the life that way over the years. It never works that way....so what to think about and what to plan about I have no clue... and hence I have decided to go with the wind, and it gets much easier when you remember and start understanding that, everything in life is temporary, Just don’t expect  anything .

I am trying to do things that will make me happy today. And Todays demand is to move on from past and to live in to present.

Just be you, but try not to judge other people instantaneously. You don’t know their background, their story, what they’ve been through, or why they do what they do.

I never learned to fake myself, so it is difficult to manage a dual standard. I have always been who I was and who I am. I am going to be in a new city, where you don’t need to try and please people who don’t like you for who you are. I don’t judge people (instantly) nor do me like that way.

This isn’t going to be like back home where you’ve been ingrained into the same group of people that you kind of have to get along with for the sake of the fact you’ve known them forever.

 Will Do Things I ’ve Been Putting I am going to be  in a new city! It gives the wave of excitement and I will take the opportunity to do things which otherwise I have put off over the passing years.

I always meant to go for jogging, yoga, meditation, gym, music travelling beaches and mountains.  I will use it as a chance to explore new city and starting all over again….. Until sometime back I’d lay in bed at night and dream about what it would be like to start over. I would move somewhere and no one would know who I was. I’d be living alone and in peace.

Now when I have got that opportunity….I am still scared somewhere…but taking a plunge and will see what happens….

No one can go back and make a new start......but one can always start from now.